Relocation & Expat Coach

“The test of any man's character is how he takes praise” anon

Since selling the UK house in February, 2010 I've been living in what feels like whirlpool.  Over the next few weeks I'll expand on what has happened - positive and negative; but the real unexpected surprise was an award that was delivered just before I left the UK. 

Cambridge Who's Who has
'recognised me as the 2010 Professional of the Year
representing the Relocation & Expat Coaching Industry'.

I arrived at the post office to collect the post on the day before I left the UK and collected this box.  Although it said 'glass' and 'fragile', I hadn't got the time to open it - so found a safe place for it in the car and drove off.

After a week of travelling through Europe and across the high seas to Madeira, I drove off the ferry and onto the island on Monday evening.  I arrived in the office on Tuesday morning and opened the box - imagine my surprise.

Recognition is always a fabulous thing, but often with recognition the recipient doesn't acknowledge it.  We always say thank you, put it away, and move on.  In the world of coaching as a coach we always try to work with our clients to ensure that they recognise their own achievements and as part of this, the awards that they might have received.  So I decided, rather than putting this award back in it's box (as I've done in the past) I would hang it on the office wall ... !

What achievements have you not recognised?  What awards have you received and put back in the box?  Take a moment out and write them down ... once you've done that what can you do to recognise your own achievements?

Want to convert your dreams/aspirations to achievable goals? 

Take this opportunity to work with someone who will not judge the reasons you want to make your move, who will not guide you down a specific path, who will motivate you to make the right decision!  You have this opportunity to work with a qualified and accredited coach who has done it!  Sign up to coaching with Barbara on http://nyasa.coachinginteractive.com - select 'click here for a free session - My Life'

Find Barbara's biog on http://www.internationalinstituteofcoaching.org/coach_referral_service/display_detail.php?trf=91

'No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel ...

... until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow.' Lin Yutang

Well made plans are sometimes those that need to be thrown out and started again.  We sold the house some 6 weeks ago and I've been living like a nomad.  Friends have been extremely kind and I've been housed all round the county - catching up with long-standing friends, having fun with new friends, relaxing with good friends - but, and yes there is always at but ... the toll that this last 6 months has taken on me has eventually caught up with me.

Builders - say no more, but sadly the house wasn't completed and the damage not repaired.  We are now looking for a new builder to continue with the next phase.  The time that has gone into this has been unbelievable - documenting all the problems, capturing it all on photograph, just for the builder to decide to ignore the final few things that are left to do.  Thanks for the quality (or is it?) of plumbing, we probably have the only house in the world that has hot water running through it's toilet!

Estate Agents/Conveyancing Agents/Solicitors - not a subject that should be aired in public!  The challenges we met in trying to sell our house in the UK - the new regulations just make it a complete paperwork nightmare.  Even with the deeds to the property, we were still unable to find out the answers to all the questions now asked.  After 5 surveys and an extra 4 weeks of living in absolute chaos we wish the new owners a happy life in the house.

Packers/Movers - we have yet to see the end result of the packing as our household goods are still in storage - so no doubt more on this later.

Work - in amongst all of the above plus more, I was trying to work full time.  Needless to say that this didn't really work successfully.  In amongst all of these challenges one of my clients decided not to pay their bills - no reason, no explanation.  To date I still don't know why and am now having to consider the alternative methods to outstanding debt collection.

Should we go through all of this to move.  YES!   

The last three weeks have shown the impact that the past 6 months has had on my health, but now that I am HOME - on the island, in the house (albeit still a building site), you suddenly realise how far you've come to ACHIEVE YOUR DREAM!

When I left Kent, UK on Wednesday it was a very sad moment.  I have lived in the county for 20 years - been close to some very good friends from Malawi, made some very good friends, and generally loved the peach and quiet of the county.  Easy to get to London, but living in the green space of the UK - as they call it 'the garden of England'.  I organised a taxi to Gatwick airport - with a check-in of 5am I felt it was unfair on any of my friends for me to stay with them and leave at 4am - so I stayed in the hotel attached to the terminal.  Thursday morning I left the UK for my new journey home ... it felt very strange, but also quite exciting.  I sat in the departure lounge and watched all the people around me either going on holiday or travelling for business; and wondered who else was there doing just what I was doing - moving from one home to another, from one country to another!

It has been a long time coming - one month short of two years since we visited the island, saw and bought the property in Madeira.  Wow!  When I saw this quote - it struck me 'how true'!  There is nothing like going home and getting into your own bed and lying down on your own pillow!  For me that was yesterday - Thursday!

It was very sad to leave but exhilarating to arrive!  A good friend phoned as I was waiting for my case at the airport and said 'welcome home'.  Other friends sent text messages - my Facebook page received a lot of good wishes - my inbox was busy today!  Thank you to all of you who supported me this week and to those who contacted me one way or another :)

Thank you to all who have been through this journey with me - who have provided me with support at times when I've needed it - and I look forward to sharing my future experiences with you too!

Want to convert your dreams/aspirations to achievable goals? 

Take this opportunity to work with someone who will not judge the reasons you want to make your move, who will not guide you down a specific path, who will motivate you to make the right decision!  You have this opportunity to work with a qualified and accredited coach who has done it!  Sign up to coaching with Barbara on http://nyasa.coachinginteractive.com - select 'click here for a free session - My Life'

Find Barbara's biog on http://www.internationalinstituteofcoaching.org/coach_referral_service/display_detail.php?trf=91

'If we really think that home ...

,,, is elsewhere and that this life is a 'wandering to find home', why should we not look forward to the arrival?'  C.S. Lewis

This is an interesting question.  I've just taken another step towards my own future home and over the past few weeks while I've been in transition, I've wondered if I will enjoy this next step.  C.S. Lewis asks 'should we not look forward to our arrival?' and I thought about this in relation to the decision that I've taken to move.  Not only that I've taken the decision to move, but also that I've taken the decision to move to a different country with a new (to me) culture. 

We sold our house and moved out the last week of February 2010.  Although I had a very quick visit to the island, I remained in the UK while the internet, telephone and other connections were organised.  This has not been a simple step, as it would seem.  Yes, we bought a beautiful property in an un-developed part of the island, but ... the guidance we were given about the quality of internet connection that we could have wasn't accurate and it has taken a number of weeks to resolve this issue.  No, it is not fully resolved, and this period of transition has truly shown that sometimes our plans don't give the result we expect. 

For me, the transition between one home and another has not been an easy step - this is for someone who has moved around the world many times without great about the move or truly planning it.  We are all very used to moving from one home to another - being very focused on where we are and where we are going.  Knowing how to stop our current services and start our new services - in many cases, just moving the services from one house to another. 

With the fantastic support that I've had on the island in everything that I've done, organised, scheduled, and planned it does come as a surprise when things don't flow as smoothly as you think that they should. 

Over the last four weeks since moving out of our house in the UK, I have not had that opportunity to be very focused on where I am going ...  I've been very lucky and this time has shown the number of truly true friends that I have, but  ...

... it has also been a very interesting learning!  Besides becoming very disoriented, very disorganised, not focused, there has been a huge impact on my health.  Those friends who have stood by me, housed me, fed me, made sure that everything that I could have needed has been provided, are those true friends that I know I will truly miss!  Yes, the question of making new friends (true friends and not just acquaintances) has crossed my mind many times.  This time has also shown that the challenges you face moving from one country to another whilst still trying to work and keep in a stable environment can be highlighted.

This last week specifically and finding this quote have really allowed me to understand the negative in just wandering through life, the negative in not truly understanding where I am, and where I am going, the negative in the expectations that I had; BUT it's been a fabulous opportunity to really know those who are true friends, to fully understand the benefits of meditation, of reflection, of the opportunity to talk to those around me who support me, to within my working life get a clear picture of those I do want to continue to work with and those I don't, and to truly design the life I want to live.  Some of this has been very hard - for example, people I thought held the same or very similar values to myself have shown not to do so!  So what to do ... this last week specifically has provided me with the opportunity to take time out and reflect and mediate on what I truly want from my own life - how I want to live it - and confirmed the reasons that I chose to move to this new (and exciting) environment.

Am I now looking forward to the arrival?  I can truly say YES!

Want to work through your challenges, your concerns, your fears, and
convert your dreams/aspirations to achievable goals? 

Take this opportunity to work with someone who will not judge the reasons you want to make your move, who will not guide you down a specific path, who will motivate you to make the right decision!  You have this opportunity to work with a qualified and accredited coach who has done it!  Sign up to coaching with Barbara on http://nyasa.coachinginteractive.com - select 'click here for a free session - My Life'.

'Power to Achieve' with Andy Harrington

 

Discounted self-development tickets to a 'Power to Achieve' weekend - Heathrow

 

A colleague and close friend, Dawn Campbell, recently purchased a coaching package from Andy Harrington (a leading authority on the psychology of success, mentor and NLP master) that included mentoring, DVD's, training, CD's and tickets to his power to achieve weekends, all good stuff. 

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Dawn is sharing these tickets with you.  Tickets that will gain you access to his ‘Power to Achieve’ event he only holds just 4 times.  Watch this 7 min video clip to see exactly how delegate’s lives are changed for the better in every way possible http://londonseminar.co.uk/r/pta1.php

 

For those lucky enough to join in, you have a choice between

1. Fri 11th - Sun 13th June 2010 (Renaissance Heathrow Hotel, London UK)
2. Fri 1st - Sun 3rd Oct 2010 (venue TBC but probably as above)
 

Over these 2 ½ day sessions, we'll be taken on a powerful journey.  To read the full schedule see http://londonseminar.co.uk/r/pta1.php.  We’ll also discover our own individual blocks and limitations that have held us back from the life we deserve.

 

Whichever area of your life you are seeking riches in be it better relationships, improved health, deeper spirituality, lots more money, or you want to start a business but lack the confidence to try, it could be any number of issues. 

 

One thing for sure, based on the video testimonials, people who take action (and I mean get out of their comfort zone, off the sofa and away from their home distractions) are unstoppable after going to one of these Power to Achieve weekends!  They get help with being blocked, they deal with self-sabotage, they get clarity around their goals and they gain a whole heap of confidence to achieve what ever it is they desire!

 

If you too like the idea of being one of these confident, action orientated, empowered people, then start by booking a ticket with Dawn right now.

 

Tickets for this event are available on-line at £1,497 Inc VAT at http://londonseminar.co.uk/r/pta1.php. 

 

But I don’t want you to pay that because I didn’t.   Dawn is offering to share her good fortune in getting a package with a few other people on a first come first served basis.   She is offering you a ticket to this life changing event for only £699 Inc VAT.

 

To find out more about the event or Andy Harrington visit http://londonseminar.co.uk/r/pta1.php or go to Dawn's site www.dawncampbellholistichealth.eu

 

To purchase one of her discounted tickets contact dawn@holistichealthcoach.eu

 

Here's to a more rewarding, richer, happier life for all of us :)

Change - Community Outreach!

The regular blog followers will be aware that Mark Wilson - a 19-year old student from Canterbury Christchurch University has been developing the   programme.  Since launching this programme in 2009, Mark has now set Change up as a Charity.  To do this Marks has been working with the Charity Commission in the UK.  To read more about the current programme Download 2010 E-PROGRAM DOCUMENT.

Disaster and Destruction! What the weather can do ...

... Saturday 20th February, 2010 was a poignant day for me.  Friday 19^th saw the final bits and pieces of our house and garden contents being packed into the container to go into storage.  I awoke on the morning of the 20^th in our bedroom with nothing in the house but my office equipment.  I had a full day of work ahead of me and then the task of dismantling the office technical equipment!

Mid-evening I was sitting on the floor of our bedroom watching a movie on my laptop and thinking about the previous few days (more on that in another posting) … when a text message arrived on my mobile – ‘xxxx – have you seen the news re Madeira?’  As I didn’t have a TV, I hadn’t.  I stopped the film – got onto the internet and searched.  Wow!  What I found was incredible.  Of all the clips, videos', etc. that I found on the internet, this one really explained how the water had rushed down the mountains - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=em4N0hVvADo ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlWAoxnwuFM&NR=1 ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=132vS9ByYNo&feature=related ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7GggrReZ8o&feature=related ... and although the majority of the information that I found was based on Funchal - this video shows Ponto do Sol, Calheta beach (where I was swimming in September 2009) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oTlBGdDEmYU&NR=1 (when you get the sub-title - the beach is gone - this, in September 2009 was a beautifully sandy beach (the sand imported from the Sahara)!) and Madelena do Mar.  These three are towns/villages on the south coast, working your way west of Funchal.

I sent a text message back, then tried to call friends on the island – nothing!  I could not get through.  I then phoned my parents in Australia as I was really concerned that they might think we were in the middle of this.  My husband was in the Algarve with his car and trailer, waiting to board the ferry the next day.  I called him, as he too was unaware of the devastation.  I then tried calling friends on the island again – still no connection!  It was interesting as I had tried during the day and had not got a connection, but at that time thought nothing of it.

After a very restless night I was into Sunday – the last day I had in our house in the UK.  I was expecting the new owners to pop round for an instruction on how the alarm worked!  Two hours later they left and I was back on the phones … still no connection with Madeira.  I was really worried about all the people we know on the island.

Download Funchal_20022010

My husband in the meantime had driven to the ferry terminal – 2½ hour early – to find that he was the 25^th car in line.  As he watched 2 cranes arrive to board the ferry too he was pulled out of line.  Being a weekly ferry he didn’t know if he was pulled out to see if there was still space for him, or if it was because he was towing a trailer.  Thankfully when the ferry arrived late, after watching all the vehicles disembark he was boarded.  Once boarded the ferry was held in port – eventually leaving 20 hours late (7am on the Monday morning).  It was for this reason, he arrived on the Tuesday after the mud/water slides.  The ferry took a lot longer from Portimao than scheduled landed successfully in the main harbour at Funchal (not the industrial harbours further along the South East coast) as we expected.  As he disembarked from the ferry he was stopped by customs – he explained that all he had in the trailer (bright yellow)/car was household ‘stuff’ and that he was going ‘home’ to our new home on the west side of the island– the customs guy asked him to drive out of Funchal as quickly as possible and go home.  The only comment was about re-registering the car … !  We believe that the reason for the lack of interest in what was actually in the car and trailer was that the queue of cars was holding up the unloading of the cranes   My husband explained that although we had talked about using the road along the north of the island (longer, more twisty, but we believed not damaged) the roads from the port that were not cordoned off took him towards the south west motorway.  Once onto the motorway he said that it was slippery, slow, and he had to weave around a number of boulders – but driveable!  It took him probably an hour longer to do the journey than it would have done normally – but once at Paul do Mar (the village we have been staying in on the south west coast), he said the roads to Ponto do Pargo were fine.  I later learnt that Ponto do Pargo had been warm and in sunshine on the 20^th February, 2010 – the day of the disaster!

Driving out of Funchal I gathered that there was not a lot of see, but since then I’ve received many photographs of the devastation caused by the mud slides and rushing water! See these photos for an idea of the devastation in Funchal. 

Silence!

All too often we speak to just fill the space with sound because we feel uncomfortable in the silence.  We might turn on the TV, the stereo, the ipod, the walkman just to fill the space around us.  

When you are thinking about your move or wanting to move, how can you really think through this whole question with a lot of noise around you.  Is this not the right time to find that silence?

Only in this silence can you really hear your own thoughts, your own concerns, your own fears, your own intuition.  Now is your opportunity to find that one place that you can be quiet, that one place that no-one will disturb you, that one place where you can just be quiet.  Once you've found this place, this is the time to switch everyone thing off - no phone, no mobile/cell, no stereo, no ipod, no walkman, no TV, no sound.  The first time you do this the sound will be 'deafening' ... and be very uncomfortable; but persevere. 

Sit there and just listen to what you can hear - your own breathing, the pen writing on the paper, the sound of the waves hitting the beach, the wind in the air - whatever the sound is, what can you really hear?

Once you've started to hear the world around you, what else can you hear?  Being really silent will allow you to hear your own thoughts.  What thoughts are going through your mind?  What answers are you hearing?  What questions are you asking?  What fears are being raised?

 Whatever the thoughts are, this is your own opportunity to truly start to listen to your own thoughts without having them impacted by the thoughts, feeling, emotions of others.  Now is your opportunity to start to ask yourself the questions that you want answers to - what is the reason that you want to move?  What is the reason that you want to make this change?  What is the reason that you want to change your environment?  Don't worry about looking for the answers, just jot down the questions as you ask them and the answers will come.

As you start to get used to silence, used to being on your own and listening to your own thoughts - you'll find that the answers to the questions you've been asking will come.

If you wish to discuss how to do this, just email me.  I look forward to hearing how this has helped you make your decision(s)!

Want to convert your dreams/aspirations to achievable goals? 

Take this opportunity to work with someone who will not judge the reasons you want to make your move, who will not guide you down a specific path, who will motivate you to make the right decision!  You have this opportunity to work with a qualified and accredited coach who has done it!  Sign up to coaching with Barbara on http://nyasa.coachinginteractive.com - select 'click here for a free session - My Life'

Find Barbara's biog on http://www.internationalinstituteofcoaching.org/coach_referral_service/display_detail.php?trf=91

Cabin Fever!

The last week has been a very interesting experience.  On our return from New Years Eve in Wales, where we celebrated our achievements in 2009 and the start of 2010 with friends, we left on very snowy roads and returned to Kent, still on very snowy roads.  The Sunday we returned saw the start of the winter we were to experience this week.

Today, a week later, we are still 'snowed in'.  It's interesting as one of the reasons for our move back to the sub-tropics was to ensure that we could spend a lot of time out doors, but here we were being forced by the weather to stay in-doors.  The South East of England is not the best place to live when it snows, as we are not prepared for the unusual weather - airports close, planes are delayed and/or cancelled; railways battle, trains are delayed and/or cancelled; and roads become impassable. 

Download 2010-01-08_snow experiences  Now we are suffering from 'Cabin Fever!' 

I received an email from a friend - Download 2010-01-08_Extracts from the diary of A Man from Kent!  Having sent it to a range of friends, the responses have agreed with the sentiments.  My only change to this is changing 'Australia' to 'Madeira' - and if only I could rely on planes flying in the direction I would be on one now.

This week has really highlighted one of our reasons for wanting to move away from the South East of England.  The frustrations that come with cabin fever show how much we are now missing the opportunities to get out and about.  Yes we can go out now, but it is with risk as the roads and pavements are very slippery and unsafe.  This frustration is added to, by the experiences and knowledge that in other countries this type of weather does not bring everything to a standstill. 

Roll on next winter when we will be in Madeira and experiencing their winter for the first time!  

Want to get out of the snow? 
Convert your dreams/aspirations to achievable goals and start to plan your move! 

Take this opportunity to work with someone who will not judge the reasons you want to make your move, who will not guide you down a specific path, who will motivate you to make the right decision!  You have this opportunity to work with a qualified and accredited coach who has done it!  Sign up to coaching with Barbara on http://nyasa.coachinginteractive.com - select 'click here for a free session - My Life'

Find Barbara's biog on http://www.internationalinstituteofcoaching.org/coach_referral_service/display_detail.php?trf=91

'New Year's eve is like every other night: ...

... there is no pause in the march of the universe,
 no breathless moment of silence among created things
that the passage of another twelve months may be noted;
and yet no man has quite the same thoughts this evening
that come with the coming of darkness on other nights.'
Hamilton Wright Mabie

via www.spiritualreflection.eu

Paperwork!

'Although it has been subject to strong criticism for a long time, bureaucracy and its variants can still be found in a large number of organisations.'

As we work through the 'selling process' we are find out just how many pieces of paper we have to submit, review, agree, sign ... !  I'm not sure whether the information about the complexities of selling have been pubished, as we are finding out step-by-very slow-step.

Not only do we have to complete and sign forms that we don't understand - the new process is not to use a legal firm that can support you in the process.  So how do you move forward? 

We've been lucky with the Estate Agents that we selected and that have sold the house - they have one person allocated to supporting each sale.  Not only did it take a couple of days to work through the paperwork, recently we were asked to sign the contract - the sale contract.  The challenge with this is that it is written in bureaucratic legalese with references to a 'standard contract'.  When we enquiried as to what the clauses were in the 'standard contract', the Estate Agency didn't know, so we contacted the Conveyancing Agents.  They sent us the original paperwork that we completed.  We explained that we were looking for clauses 'x' in the 'standard contract' and they send us a very old frequently photocopied copy of the 'standard contract'.  With great difficulty we battled our way through this contract in line with the sale contract and found that we were now doing the legal work!  It's a scary position to be in ... but we have been very lucky with the Estate Agency representative - they have supported us.

Now we are in the position of having returned the paperwork ... and know no more!  We have put in a request for an exchange date and a completion date, but these new processes don't allow you to get confirmation.

Towards the end of last week we found out that the VAT rate to be charged on these services is dependant upon when we exchange and that in the UK this goes up by 2.5% on the 1st January, 2010; but that our Conveyancing Agents don't seem to worry about the additional charge that will be made to us.

So although we found the purchasing process in Madeira an unusual one, we were supported all the way through the process with clear understanding of what was happening when.

Planning ... what a challenge when you are unable to find out the dates that are required for planning!  Watch for the next challenge in organising the moving companies. 

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